SPEAKER_00 0:00

If my head's in a jar, am I still showing up at the office? Welcome to another episode of Smells Like Humans. This is the podcast where we explore the curious things that people do, the very human things that grab our attention, and cause us to wonder what and why. I'm Ross, your host, and today, my guest is the likable, relatable, and always enjoyable Jamie. Hello, Jamie. Hello, Ross. Welcome everyone. Friends, help us grow the community by sharing the show. That really, really helps. We want to spread the love that only smells like human can spread. Wow. At the end, I'll mention other ways you can help us, but right now let's get going. So, Jamie, we know something about humans. Humans like to drive. True. We like to drive. And we don't like not being able to drive.

SPEAKER_02 0:59

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 1:00

We don't like people telling us we can't drive or we don't drive well. For years, people have complained about older drivers being a hazard or just in the way. Driving too slow is the usual complaint. There's this stereotype of an oldster peering over the top of a steering wheel in this giant American car. And they're just going about four miles an hour. And one of the biggest complainers was me. Yeah, when I was a teenager, I complained a lot about older drivers, and I uh advocated vociferously for a yearly assessment of drivers once they reached the age of 50.

SPEAKER_02 1:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:50

And my mother had just turned 50 at the time, and she thought that was very funny that I thought that.

SPEAKER_01 1:56

50 does seem young.

SPEAKER_00 1:58

But I was just convinced that um there were a lot of people out there that I had just were either unable to drive or had forgotten how to drive, or maybe never knew. And I still feel that way.

SPEAKER_01 2:11

Yes, me too.

SPEAKER_00 2:12

I still feel that way. In fact, I think the driving test should be much harder and more frequent for everybody.

SPEAKER_01 2:21

It is kind of crazy that you get it when you're a kid and then you never get tested again.

SPEAKER_00 2:26

Nobody tests you. They check your eyesight. That's crazy. Yeah, they made a little make you look in the thing and say, can you read like the biggest letters?

SPEAKER_02 2:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:34

Um, you know, can you fill out a can you sign your name? Can you stand in front of a camera? That's those are all the that's it. And one thing we know about humans is that we all tend to think we're great drivers, and everybody else is a bad driver. Yeah. That's nothing new. But it does seem strange. I agree. It seems strange that you there's this skill, and you demonstrate it when you're at the height of your reflexes. Yeah. And then that's you're good for the next however long you live. You're good. You're good. And I actually think that most people can't drive very well. Yeah. Um, sure. I mean, younger people are known for doing a lot of fast driving and reckless things. But I see bad driving across all the groups.

SPEAKER_01 3:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:28

Now you don't have a car right now. No, I don't. Do you drive anywhere?

SPEAKER_01 3:33

I don't really drive. Um, there's some like car sharing programs here in in Portland that uh if I need to get somewhere, I can do uh that. But I also have uh pretty bad road rage. So if I can just take an Uber and like not watch the road, that maybe is better for me.

SPEAKER_00 3:57

What gets your road rage going?

SPEAKER_01 3:59

Everything bad drivers. Everyone's a bad driver.

SPEAKER_00 4:02

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 4:02

And in Portland, there's a bunch of like one-way streets and speed limits really low. And there's a lot of tricky things. There's a lot of things. If I can just look at my phone instead of a road, I would prefer it.

SPEAKER_00 4:14

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I I have normal road rage. I think I s at a normal level for an East Coast person. Yeah. Not for here. But um, but yeah, I hate I I th everybody has their their things that set them, but I hate the tail, the ones that tail drag all the way up to a a light, yeah, and then the light turns yellow and they floor it and leave you hanging at the red. Yes. Those people.

SPEAKER_01 4:38

Those people.

SPEAKER_00 4:39

Those people. Anyway, the future for all of us is pod cars.

SPEAKER_01 4:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:44

So self-driven. There'll be self-driven pods. They won't even look like cars, they'll just look like these little things, you know, a couple of pill capsule. Yeah, just a capsule. You sit in there, be a screen in there to do stuff, be online, whatever you do. And there won't be any, no one will be driving anymore in the future because it it's you won't need to. And it doesn't work. I mean, there's too much anywhere where there's traffic, it's because people make a lot of bad decisions. And if you take people out of the equation and let machines do all the driving, then the cars can go, you can have many more cars on the road and they can go much faster, and there's no risk. And of course, the whole drinking and driving thing is, you know, becomes not a non-issue. So, what's happening right now is our engineer Derek is coming in with a hot cup of Joe, and this is happening right now. In real time. And that's because this is the greatest studio, Portland Underground Studio. Yes. You put some kind of dry. Yeah, you put I don't know what's in there.

SPEAKER_01 5:40

There's some booze in there.

SPEAKER_00 5:41

I don't know what happens, but a half an hour after we're done, I'm asleep. I was last last time I woke up behind the building with a Vietnamese dog. So yeah, the I really think the future is pod cars. You won't have drunk driving problem anymore, all that stuff. And that's stupid anyway. It's it's stupid that you can drive a car after you've had a drink. Like cars should just not work. For now, we're still driving. Right. And everybody thinks they're great, and everybody thinks everybody else is reckless. Recently, I read an article that says old drivers aren't that bad. And some of the highlights are that in this recent study, there was a 43% drop in fatal accidents among drivers 70 and older. And there were fewer crashes with drivers over 70.

SPEAKER_02 6:36

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 6:37

And so the article says, well, you know, older adults, they have more experience. They don't drive as fast, they're less likely to drink and drive, they pay attention to road signs, they don't drive in bad weather, and they don't like driving at night. So that reduces the risk. And then there are, of course, um safer cars that some people can afford, you know, that have airbags and junk. So I think less people overall are cracking up. But there are also some cars that like will stop for you now.

SPEAKER_01 7:08

Like if you they park for you, they do it all.

SPEAKER_00 7:11

Yeah, so so they're saying that has something to do with it. Um, and that maybe roads are safer, getting safer, whatever. Okay. Um, but at the same time, the article says, you know, as you get older, you know, stuff starts falling apart, including, you know, your ability to drive. Yeah. And so this one geriatician says, and this is I gotta just say this quote to you, and I'm not gonna say anything about it and see if see if it hits you the way it hit me. On average, men have to stop driving five or six years before they die.

SPEAKER_01 7:49

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 7:51

How does that hit you?

SPEAKER_01 7:52

Um I mean, yeah, probably. How do you know when you're gonna die?

SPEAKER_00 8:00

That's what I mean.

SPEAKER_01 8:03

I'm thinking of like a a 95-year-old or something. Like Yeah, you probably shouldn't be driving, but yeah, if if you're 40 and you're gonna die in a year, how do you know?

SPEAKER_00 8:14

And for women, it's 10 years before they die. Well, that's just sex. But how do you know? I don't know how you calculate it. I don't know how you know if you don't know your endpoint and nobody knows their endpoint, they just know they're gonna have one.

SPEAKER_02 8:26

Right.

SPEAKER_00 8:27

And so um the other thing is that, first of all, a lot of older people don't want to stop driving. Even if they're uh gonna die tomorrow, they still want to, you know, take it around the block a couple of times. And the other thing that happens to people when they can't drive, they feel more isolated, they feel less part of things, they feel more lonely. Um, it can correlate with things like poor health. It's like being able to go out in the world and have the freedom of you know um driving yourself is is life enhancing.

SPEAKER_01 9:05

I will say that that is uh definitely true for me not having a car, uh, is pretty it sometimes it sucks. Like you want to go on a hike or you know, go to a a friend's house that lives out in the suburbs or something, you know, it's it it does uh throw a bit of a a wrench in a little isolating on a day-to-day, but like if there's those certain things that like you can't do if you don't have a car.

SPEAKER_00 9:35

Right. And uh, you know, people have reported, you know, a feeling like a loss of social status or loss of independence and just not being able to do things they want to do. And I told you my dad continued to drive after I told him it was no longer safe for him to do so. He just secretly did it and he borrowed someone else's car. Yeah. And they were ha they were also old and they were happy to let him drive.

SPEAKER_02 10:00

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 10:01

As if like that was better for them. Yeah. Um there apparently is this program called Can Drive, and you it tracks and it films the driving, how the older person is driving. Okay, and then you can sit down and watch this video with them and say, Hey, see that stop sign you ran and that school bus you t-boned? Yeah, see that? That's not good. But you know, that's not gonna work. I you just you you know some old people in your life. I know a few. That doesn't work. Yeah, you can't first of all, they're not gonna want to watch that. Don't tell me what I'm doing wrong. True. And then what's the conclusion? So you gotta do a better driving dad or mom or grandma. And it's like, leave me alone. Yeah. Yeah, they don't nobody wants to hear that. No. Uh in Ontario, Canada, drivers over 80 have to renew their license every two years. I think that's good. I think that's good too. But I'd say again, let's start at 50 or even 45. Yeah. In this country, any you can be you can be any age, yeah, and no one's asking any questions. You just need to pass a vision test every eight years. Eight years? That's all we're doing. Oh my god. And so we wonder why um, you know, older people might be a little unsafe out there. Yeah. And I and and I'm not impressed with the article statistics about saying, hey, they're crashing less. I've never, when I was younger and I was being uh an ageist by saying older people, 50 and older, needed to take a test every year because they can't drive. I realized that was an ageist thing to believe at that time, and it still is, but I never thought it was because they were cracking up. It's not, they're never ever getting in accidents, it's they're causing accidents by jacking around on the road. Yeah. Yeah, and they're just all over the place. They don't know what a lane is or where it is, and but you so they cause other people like me to have to do some kind of weird maneuver, and the next thing I know, I've crashed, and they're just going on down the road.

SPEAKER_02 12:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:16

Oh, do what happened to you today, Maud? Nothing. Just had a little drive. Behind them, there are cars in flames. Yes, there's there's bedlam and breakage.

SPEAKER_01 12:26

You know what drives me absolutely bonkers uh is when people when you're driving and um someone like you know, you have your right-away kind of a situation, right? But someone thinks that they're doing you a favor by being like, no, you go first, even though they have the right-of-the-art. Right. Like, no, you go first. But you're messing it up for everybody. You gotta just do your thing. Yeah. Go. Don't just be, oh, you no, you go. No, don't do anything. There's a there are rules for a reason.

SPEAKER_00 12:55

Yeah, yeah. That's we don't have that problem on the East Coast. Out here, you have this problem.

SPEAKER_01 13:01

People are too nice.

SPEAKER_00 13:02

And it's the it's when people, the thing that kills me is when they're letting so there's a long line where like we're all in a line trying to get through an intersection and it's taking forever. And then somebody's waving in somebody from a parking lot because they just happen to show up in that moment. They haven't been putting in the time.

SPEAKER_02 13:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:18

Why did they get to cut? Yeah. Like nobody likes cutters, but the person waving them in thinks I'm doing a favor.

SPEAKER_01 13:26

And I say you're screwing it up.

SPEAKER_00 13:27

You're screwing everybody behind you, and you ought to ask us all first. Yes. Like, get out of your car, take a pole, and see if we're okay with it. Because we're not. Let that sucker in the parking lot cool as jets for a hot second. We've been put Okay. Yeah. Anyway, you can see I have a problem.

SPEAKER_01 13:46

That's why I don't drive my road rage. That's a prime example. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 13:50

And I but I'm working on it.

SPEAKER_01 13:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:53

So um, you know, sometimes these older people, what they do is they start driving golf carts. They get into communities where they don't have to drive anymore. They can drive golf carts. But I've heard I've read stories where they're crashing golf carts into each other because they're driving drunk.

SPEAKER_02 14:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:10

And I was reading about this one uh older person community called the Villages in Central Florida. I think they've done some Florida man documentary. There's I know there's at least one documentary on this place, and I know it's been written up for other reasons, but it's like a Disneyland for older people that have enough money to live there. I don't know how I don't think you have to be rich to live there, but you have to have something.

SPEAKER_02 14:35

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 14:36

And um, and it was an interesting documentary to watch um on this on the villages, if you want to check it out. But um, they talked about like the in this article about the problems with golf cart driving and uh um uh people being drunk uh and driving. Well, what else are you gonna do? But this but it's like a place exactly, it's like a whole community of for older people, it's like a safe place for them to run amok with very few consequences. How does that sound to you though, as a thing to aspire to? Would you could you see yourself?

SPEAKER_01 15:12

Like retire in Florida and drunk on a golf court?

SPEAKER_00 15:15

Put putting putting Florida part aside, but what about living in a community of only older people?

SPEAKER_01 15:23

People my age, though, because I am older at this point. Right?

SPEAKER_00 15:28

I don't know what you mean.

SPEAKER_01 15:29

I mean when you get when I get to that age, yes, you're with those the Disneyland of old people, you're with just other old people drunk as hell, driving wove-cart around. Yeah, that sounds great. Okay, that sounds good to you.

SPEAKER_00 15:44

I certainly understand why people would like it because being an old person in this country is bad.

SPEAKER_02 15:50

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 15:51

Okay, you're totally marginalized.

SPEAKER_02 15:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:53

Um nobody likes old people. No, and I have a theory about this.

SPEAKER_01 15:59

Okay, let's hear it.

SPEAKER_00 16:00

Um, well, first of all, let me just establish the predicate. So I have I'm fortunate enough to have a diverse uh friend base. So I have younger friends, uh, people from all walks of life in my friend base, and so I hear a lot of younger people complaining about older people that they're cranky, they're rude, that they're dismissive, whatever. Yeah, they don't like them. Okay. And what I'll say sometimes if I can get them to listen is I I get that, and there's no excuse for anyone being rude to anyone, I don't care what their age is, right, or treating someone badly, but a lot of old people are dealing with stuff like medical stuff, they uh can't do what they used to do, so that that they don't feel great about that. Yeah, they're used to people not treating them well or ignoring them or discounting them because they're old, right? And so they get cranky, and it doesn't excuse again, doesn't excuse their behavior, but it just helps you understand like might maybe why they're not the jolliest people you meet. Sure. So some of those people can be cranky, but I do understand why those people would think it was cool to live in this community where there's just people like them. Yeah, there's nobody uh, you know, there's there's no young people to discount them. Like they matter in this community. You're they're all equals, they're all equals, they all there's all sorts of activities and things. But I gotta tell you though, I the thought of living like that is frightening to me.

SPEAKER_01 17:42

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 17:43

I don't I wouldn't you're not about it. I I'm afraid of being somehow getting to a point where that would make sense to me to live in a community of old people and that what about it?

SPEAKER_01 17:58

Do you not What scares you?

SPEAKER_00 18:01

All of it.

SPEAKER_01 18:02

Everything.

SPEAKER_00 18:03

Everything. Just the does the uh I don't yeah, that's a great question. What is scary about it? Well, the lack of diversity. Um the In age. In a well, in the villages, I think it's like ninety-eight percent white. So but even if you were to control for uh, you know, ethnic diversity, the lack of just having everyone from you know the same demographic age-wise, right? Uh I just feel like that's not as enriching.

SPEAKER_01 18:37

Yeah. My dad, uh, I know we've talked about it on previous episodes, but my dad uh has uh early onset dementia, so he's much younger than everybody else in his uh like retirement community. And every time I talk to him, he's like, oh my god, the activities here. They're because everyone's like in their, you know, 80s or plus, and he's in his early 60s, and he's just like, oh my god, I would rather do anything else than the activities that they have at my place.

SPEAKER_00 19:11

They're not great. They're not great. And I I I totally understand contextually they make sense. So I'm not saying they shouldn't be doing these activities, but like when I would go and there'd be a group of elderly people sitting around a table, kind of hitting a balloon around the table.

SPEAKER_01 19:28

I just specifically said that one. He's like, I'm not doing this.

SPEAKER_00 19:34

Yeah, it's just like I just, you know, and and at the villages, you know, at these retirement communities, these people are are are they're still able-bodied. They're they're they're able to like live on their own. Yeah. And the activities aren't they're different. Right. But, you know, like they have and they're fun. Like I could see the fun of it. It's like I don't even know why it's scary to me, but something about it seems a little hellish. It's a little scary to be feel like I would be in that and be okay.

SPEAKER_01 20:05

Right. Like you don't want to do like water aerobic Zumba or something with the other elderly women.

SPEAKER_00 20:14

Yeah, I um I don't. And I I realize I'm as I'm having this conversation with you, I realize I need to work on this. You know, older people in our society are deemed to be weaker, less attractive versions of their younger selves. The elderly people in this country have not been treated as first-class citizens. Sure. But I think I know the reason. What? The real reason. It's not because they can't drive, or it's not because they're cranky when they're ordering their coffee, or whatever the deal is. It's not because they act entitled, or, you know, or say things they shouldn't say too loudly. I mean, those things can be irritating. I think the real reason that there's ageism is because old people subconsciously remind us that we're all gonna die. Like when you go and you look at someone and they're cragging out hard, you know, their skin is falling off their bones and they're walking weird and they can't see, and whether they're skin. Yeah, and they're just and you're re you're repulsed. You're like, ugh, but it's not because of them, it's because they're basically an advertisement for your future.

SPEAKER_03 21:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:37

And nobody actually wants to think they're gonna go down that road. It's a Dorian Gray situation. That's what they want. Looking at the painting. Yeah.

unknown 21:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:46

They don't want to go there. Nobody does. Nobody every when you're in your teen years or your twenties or even your thirties, you just like, nah, that's not that's not gonna happen to me. And I gotta tell you, is as I get older, I do surprise myself because Inside, when you're inside this sack of protoplasm and looking outward, you forget that you're aging.

SPEAKER_02 22:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 22:09

I always remember older people saying it doesn't feel like I'm that old. And you'd look at it and you go like, Well, you are right. You are Crib Keeper. So get used to it. And now as I get older, I realize, oh yeah, I get that. Yeah, that really is true. You don't really feel um, you know, that it's that different and it doesn't seem, you know, that long.

SPEAKER_01 22:30

Yeah. I watch a lot of uh reality television. Like, oh my god, I watch so much trash, trash on trash. But uh one thing that I notice from like the real housewives, whatever is like, you know, chasing the fountain of youth. And so you see these people from like season one, and then you see them get like the Botox and the fillers and everything. All the work. Yeah, everything. And and by the end of the season they don't look like or by the end of the series, they don't look like the person because the person from the original because they're like chasing the the rainbow kind of a thing. They're a balloon animal. It's wild. What happened to them? Sometimes it's good. Sometimes it is good. Some some And I get it. I will probably be like a I don't know, pincushion when I'm older. Yeah. An old handbag. I'll just get everything done. I think you can just call like a little Joan Joan Rivers. Yeah. Just get it. I'm gonna get it all done.

SPEAKER_00 23:29

Yeah, yeah. I think I think that happens, I think, as you age. I always thought I would never do anything, but yeah, I think you can get like a bicycle pump and just pump a few slices. Whenever you need like a little more everything starts getting a little slack, you can just pump it up.

SPEAKER_01 23:44

Just tighten the crank in the back of your head and make the skin a little bit tighter.

SPEAKER_00 23:48

Give me a couple of turns.

SPEAKER_01 23:50

Um I can't smile anymore.

SPEAKER_00 23:52

That's fine.

SPEAKER_01 23:53

Or I'm always smiling. I'm really sad, but you can't tell because I can only show this one emotion, but trust me, I'm mad.

SPEAKER_00 24:00

I'm killing on the clown circuit. So um, so yeah, I really think that well, what do you think about this? This idea that when we see an older person it's like we don't are we don't necessarily express it even to ourselves that it's but it's kind of like to me, it's like it's we we feel this negative feeling because it's we're all on that path.

SPEAKER_02 24:25

Right. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:27

This is your future if you're lucky.

SPEAKER_02 24:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:29

Because dying young is no great win.

SPEAKER_02 24:34

No.

SPEAKER_00 24:35

Um nobody wants to. Right. So, but the alternative is cracksack. Now they are talking about how they're gonna get people living longer in the not too distant future, so living to a hundred won't be such a hard thing. 120, 140 is possible.

SPEAKER_01 24:53

That isn't the I mean the planet's gonna overheat before that happens anyway, right?

SPEAKER_00 24:57

It doesn't seem sustainable to have people living longer. And what I don't know what they're they're gonna be in a jar. I don't know what their status is gonna be.

SPEAKER_01 25:04

Like Yeah, just a floating head in a jar with like a robot body.

SPEAKER_00 25:08

Yeah, like I don't know if that's good. I mean, I don't know, and I don't know if I want to know people that long. I don't know if I want to be in the game that long. Like, do I still gotta work with my robot body? That's the thing. If the head's in a jar, am I still showing up at the office? Then how am I getting there?

SPEAKER_01 25:24

Is it do I want to go lay on a beach in Cancun if I'm just a head in a jar with a robot body? I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 25:32

I don't know. I just want to ask you what kind of old person you think you'll be.

SPEAKER_01 25:37

I'm gonna be mostly plastic, mostly made out of plastic. Everything's gonna be like too tight, uh m mostly not real.

SPEAKER_00 25:46

That's great. I think you should do whatever the hell you want. But what what do you think?

SPEAKER_01 25:53

She looks amazing. She looks great. She looks great. She's had all the things done. And she looks amazing, but not like crazy, right? Yeah. She looks like Jane Fonda still.

SPEAKER_00 26:04

Yeah, there's a line, and I think some people cross it. And I think once you're what happens is once you start going down that road, you forget you lose perspective.

SPEAKER_01 26:13

Yeah. You could stalker stalker channing or Melanie Griffiths. I don't know if you've seen them recently, but I'm gonna show you after this episode because But I know, I know what happens. Yeah, people go a little bit nuts on the filler or whatever.

SPEAKER_00 26:27

You need someone in your life who you trust to say, that's enough.

SPEAKER_01 26:32

Will you tell me, Ross, once?

SPEAKER_00 26:35

Well, do you want me to tell you? Like, would you want that kind of feedback? See, that's the thing. And so I'm not sure you want someone saying, uh no.

SPEAKER_01 26:43

No, I'm gonna do whatever I want. You can deal with it.

SPEAKER_00 26:46

I think yeah, I think I think that would be better. I think the days of wanting men to tell women to do about their bodies, I hopefully the those days are way over.

SPEAKER_01 27:00

Leave us alone.

SPEAKER_00 27:01

I I'm okay with that.

SPEAKER_01 27:03

I just want to be a head in a jar on a beach.

SPEAKER_00 27:05

It's hard to think of old people as being anything other than old their whole life.

SPEAKER_01 27:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 27:09

I mean, when I was younger, I used to say, Oh, old people.

SPEAKER_02 27:12

Right.

SPEAKER_00 27:12

I really I was oh, old people.

SPEAKER_02 27:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 27:15

And um, and it's like, well, they were once not old people. Yeah. You know, and I appreciate that now, but when I was younger, I didn't. I just thought they were a species of humans. Yeah. That were old people. And if we want to fix the problem with the elderly, just put them down at birth. But you know, that doesn't make sense.

SPEAKER_01 27:34

Right.

SPEAKER_00 27:34

I think old people should be allowed to drive. I think young people should be allowed to drive. I think people in the middle should be allowed to drive. Okay. I think everyone should be allowed to drive as long as driving is still a thing. But you gotta be tested regularly.

SPEAKER_01 27:48

More than every eight years.

SPEAKER_00 27:49

And I would say stringently. I want some str I want to really be tested. Every two years. And at some point I might be one of those people, and I think I need to be rooted out because I will always believe I'm driving great.

SPEAKER_01 28:02

Yeah. You're a little bit scary. A little bit.

SPEAKER_00 28:05

I'm a little scary.

SPEAKER_01 28:06

A little bit scary driver.

SPEAKER_00 28:08

I've driven with you. Oh, there's scary, and then there's me driving by myself. And that's that would scare a lot of people.

SPEAKER_01 28:14

When you have to like turn down the volume of the music so that you can drive better, is that so you can see better in the car.

SPEAKER_00 28:21

Wait, what is that?

SPEAKER_01 28:22

That's the thing. Yeah, you get like lost or something. You're like driving bad, you you have to turn down the volume of the music so that you can focus. Who does this? The internet.

SPEAKER_00 28:32

The internet does it. Wow, you turn down the volume.

SPEAKER_01 28:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 28:38

How does that help?

SPEAKER_01 28:39

I don't know, but it does. It's science.

SPEAKER_00 28:42

Wow. I have to well touch down on the distraction.

SPEAKER_02 28:45

I guess so, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 28:46

Yeah. So you have to put your beer down, turn down the music, take the doobie out of your mouth.

SPEAKER_01 28:52

Right.

SPEAKER_00 28:53

We still call them doobies now. Take the blunt.

SPEAKER_01 28:56

Yeah, that's ooh, you sound hip.

SPEAKER_00 28:58

I that's like I said, I got a wide variety of friends. I got a wide variety of friends, and they take a wide variety of things. Let's just all get tested, people. Yeah. By the way, speaking of tested, a lot of these ultras running around the villages are passing around STDs. I heard like it's candy canes.

SPEAKER_03 29:16

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 29:17

Like that's like a whole nother thing. You think you're up beyond that. Like, okay, those days are banging. No, you're still out there. Yeah, anything. Golf cart, golf cart sex. Driving.

SPEAKER_01 29:30

Drunk as hell, banging in a golf cart.

SPEAKER_00 29:33

That's gotta be a song.

SPEAKER_01 29:36

If it's not already, it's gonna be now.

SPEAKER_00 29:38

Drunk as hell, banging in a golf cart. Whatever happened to my teeth. So um that might not be the right lyrics. That was good. Well, thanks for hanging out with me and talking about this. I feel like we have solved nothing, but we've certainly put the discussion out there, and hopefully, people will be inspired to fix this dangerous problem of untested drivers of any age. Thank all of you for joining us for this episode. We'd love for you to help us. You can give us a great rating if your app allows you to do that, the highest rating, and that glowing review really helps people find us. You can follow us on Instagram in particular, and we'd love to see you there. And you can support us on Patreon. You can find us there. So, any way that you can help us, the most important thing you can do is talk up the show, share it with people. Um, if you like um participating with us, first of all, we're grateful that you're here and we appreciate you so much. But we really are independent and we really do need your help to grow the show. So anything you can do to share it with people you think might enjoy it and encourage them to do the same, man, that really helps. So thank you for considering that. And we hope you will tune in to another episode because whether you are barely peering over the top of the steering wheel, or you're laying on a beach with your head in a jar, it's important to remember that we all smell like humans. Goodbye, everybody.