Smells Like Humans
Top 5% global podcast! Smells Like Humans is a seasonal podcast dedicated to bringing a humorous perspective to quirky and curious aspects of human behavior. Each show, the SLH crew will focus on a different topic, and share personal stories and observations in a way that sounds like you’re hanging out with your funny friends. The stories and commentary are presented with humor and warmth, since let’s face it: we all smell like humans. (Contact us: contactSLH19581980@gmail.com)
Smells Like Humans
HIDE THE BABY..."POPSY" IS COMING!
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Madeline joins Ross to discuss whether we are all a little entitled and maybe that is ok. Tangents include: Guillotines; "Flag POIL"; the gates of Versailles; pitchforks; "Am I the A-Hole?"; inviting the Devil in; asking for a raise; Grady and his ring of keys; Poughkeepsie.
Notes:
- https://www.nytimes.com/2022/08/10/style/why-does-my-grandson-think-i-should-pay-him-for-missing-our-family-vacation.html?campaign_id=0&emc=edit_cr_20220810&instance_id=0&nl=comments-notifications®i_id=78153500&segment_id=0&user_id=9445bc1b4874eb19b226a2f640d3ffe3#commentsContainer&permid=119783709:119783709
- https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/52209/15-historical-complaints-about-young-people-ruining-everything
Contact us: contactSLH19581980@gmail.com
knows about the baby.
SPEAKER_02They know it's about the baby.
SPEAKER_00They knows about the baby.
SPEAKER_04Popsy knows about the baby.
SPEAKER_00Popsy knows.
SPEAKER_04Scram. Hide in the closet. Hide the baby in the closet.
SPEAKER_03Welcome to another episode of Smells Like Humans. This is the podcast where we explore the curious things that people do, the very human things that grab our attention and cause us to wonder what and why. I'm Ross, your host and today's guest is not only someone who is talented and smart, she also emits an aura of goodness. Madeline.
SPEAKER_00Oh my gosh, thank you. You're gonna give me a huge head too.
SPEAKER_03Welcome to the show everyone and thanks so much for listening. You can help us by sharing the show. We appreciate that. We appreciate your support. And our community is growing thanks to you. Please continue to help us any way you can share the show with anyone that you think would like it. Let's dig into this week's episode. Now we know Madeline just about every older generation to come along claims there's something inherently wrong with the latest generation.
SPEAKER_00That is true.
SPEAKER_03And by the same token the latest generation often claims there's something inherently defective about the older generation. That is also true. This is not a new thing. This dance has been going on for a long, long while and in this context one theme that comes up a lot is entitlement. Who is acting unreasonably entitled? Who, if anyone is actually entitled and what makes us care so much about it. You and I are well positioned to discuss this topic because we cover a nice little range in that one of us is old and one of us is young, Gur. So one of us is probably guilty of something let's find out what. So I came across one of those advice columns, which I've always enjoyed my whole life.
SPEAKER_00Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_03I like when people write in and I like to hear what the answers are and whether I agree or disagree.
SPEAKER_00I like to hear what names they give themselves.
SPEAKER_03Okay that's a sleepless in Seattle. I know you don't know what's coming. I don't but I'm that's gonna be a question I have for you. Okay so let me read this letter I came across quote I am treating my family to a special vacation in Alaska. My grandson, 28, and his wife are unable to join us. They're expecting a baby soon. I'm sorry they can't come but I was shocked when my grandson asked me for a cash gift equal to what I would have spent for them to join us on the trip. He suggested I donate the money to the baby's college fund. I am stunned I was happy to help them with wedding expenses and part of the down payment on their first home but I told him this is not how life works was I wrong Popsy.
SPEAKER_00Popsy oh my goodness is right in name Popsy Popsy Oh I wish there was a city Popsy in Poughkeepsie do you know I'm from Poughkeepsie are you really from Poughkeepsie?
SPEAKER_03I did not know that I am I really am from Poughkeepsie but I did not know Popsy.
SPEAKER_00Okay what do you think that name Popsy Popsy you liking that? Yeah and it's got a good there's some it's got a good juju I'm Popsy I'm I it makes me feel a little creepy.
SPEAKER_03But anyway my grandfather when he was alive uh did not know my name oh wow well there were a lot of you there were a lot of well yes and I was technically named after him were you really well then you'd think it would be memorable. Well here was the problem his his name was Rosario oh but my parents said we want to name this kid after Rosario but we don't want to call him Rosario because in modern times that'll just lead to teasing and abuse. Ah okay so let's call him some version of that how about Ross is not Italian at all. So when they told my grandfather that I was named for him and he said what's the kid's name and they said Ross he just laughed and later called me Russell Oh I'm so sorry to hear that. That was the letter I'm not going to tell you what the advice person said right off the bat.
SPEAKER_00I want to know what's your initial reaction to that my initial reaction to that is that that does sound quite entitled of the younger person to assume the grandkid to assume that that would be that it just doesn't feel appropriate to ask actually less about entitlement and more about so s societal like not norms even but just politeness. That doesn't seem like I mean you know I feel like we don't have enough background info is this right is this part of a conversation that they that family would normally have or not because in my life experience the idea of asking that makes me want to curl up under a rock and die.
SPEAKER_03Yes so I think I can feel your neurons leapfrogging playing leapfrog with each other. So but initially it felt wrong to you initially and that's how I felt it was like holy cow that's just a come on that's just a old fashioned cash grab Batman. Stop stop that it's rude don't do it. But then I started reading not only the advice givers reaction but then I started reading other people's other people wrote in oh okay like the comment section yeah the comment section always rife with exciting things. So the advice person reacted kind of the way we did initially and I'll just cut to the chase here your generous offer to spring for a family vacation does not oblige you to make compensatory payments to those unable to attend.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Let him know that his behavior was hurtful and risked making you feel like a walking ATM. Ooh that's the advice columnist response. So then I started reading other people's responses and it got me thinking like you started doing like what's the context for this one person wrote to me the money sounds like it's being used as a means of control by the grandparents.
SPEAKER_00Ooh interesting I hadn't thought about that.
SPEAKER_03Yeah no it could be but people do that kind of thing right somebody wrote in it would never ever occur to me to ask my parents for a check for the amount they saved because I stayed home from the trip. Here's one I liked I am shocked and appalled by the letter that young man is inviting the devil in yeah that sounds like an internet comments section here's somebody who says it seems grandpa wanted to attach strings. Come on this trip and I'll spend the money but I don't want to spend the money for my great grandchild. Yeah no so you know it's funny with these comment sections you start you know people just come at you.
SPEAKER_00Do you know what it makes me think of um I'm not on Reddit regularly but there's a Reddit thread that's um am I the asshole uh and I find this fascinating and there's like a Twitter account that collates a lot of them and I'll look at those sometimes and uh it'll be like you know someone will post like I threw out all of my girlfriend's socks am I the asshole is like the title of the post, right? But it goes through and explains the situation. And what I have learned is 90% of the time if it sounds in the title like they're innocent and the other person is overreacting, actually they're the asshole because you get into the details of the background stuff and you're like, oh no the title you were trying to make yourself sound good. You pulled some weird shit here.
SPEAKER_03Yes you're getting to the nut of this whole thing for me and we're gonna get to it in a minute but I just have to take a sidebar here and just say if you're writing into a a post or a column or a site that's called Am I the Asshole, doesn't that tell you something right there? If you're thinking a lot of the time maybe I need to I'm wondering about my behavior. I just choked a squirrel in the park.
SPEAKER_00Right. Am I the asshole? I'll tell you what it's it's I would say what I've seen is like a 70-30 split. 70% it's people who are absolutely the asshole and are trying to get someone to tell them they're not but they definitely are. And then 30% are these poor people who have been like gaslit and downtrodden so much that they're like oh my you know my horrible abusive partner is telling me I'm the asshole in the situation are they right and you're like no get out. Well they should be writing into am I being gaslit I mean yeah but they've been they've been gaslit so much that they're convinced they're the asshole.
SPEAKER_03They're not the asshole they've been gaslit so much. They're convinced they're the asshole we found the episode title. There it is it's not about entitlement at all. Nope um someone wrote wow sorry to hear some people really think you owe them for being alive stay strong no need to give in to such greed well they wouldn't literally be alive without that person like you know they they wouldn't have to deal with the stress of finances if their grandparent hadn't had their parents and their parents hadn't had them.
SPEAKER_00So maybe there is something here.
SPEAKER_03Grandparents are to blame is what you're saying.
SPEAKER_00Maybe I I don't mind blaming them man let's talk about well not just the older generation but the 1% right but let's talk about let's talk about generational wealth and let's talk about uh the the increase of cost of living in this country as compared to the increase of average wages and let's talk about wow yeah it's tough out here well put down the pitchfork for a minute okay I'm I'm setting in town I'll have the devil hold it I invited him inside here devil please hold this pitchfork the the gates to Versailles are still closed.
SPEAKER_03Hold on one second I just want to um point out that what this comment I think is referring to is that there's a perception of apparently this person writing in that younger people feel like the old people are sitting on their money and like give it up already. Like we're waiting for you to croak off. Why can't you just spill it out now so we can get on with it.
SPEAKER_00Right. Well it is pretty hard to get money any other way in this economy. So and a pitchfork is really Yeah I'm so sorry I I was holding I still had a pinky finger on it I I gotta let go all the way.
SPEAKER_03No when you have a pitchfork you got to use it. It's like the whole thing when you bring a gun into an improv scene right that's Chekhov's law. Yeah exactly so uh let's see if there are any others um oh there was one that said I've noticed that many older people use their wealth to manipulate their children and grandchildren and don't ever recognize how manipulative they are being and that's I think an actual thing. I think so too that not just older people but anybody with a little extra cash they don't actually think they think they're being generous sometimes and they don't really ask themselves the question why am I doing this? Right. What is what is am I doing it because I'm a nice person I just want to help somebody or am I doing it to get something yeah is there a power play here. How does it make me feel to right yeah is it a power play um this person writes maybe this is the one I like maybe Popsy new grandson wouldn't be able to come due to an impending new child and scheduled the trip anyway oh now they're like it's even going beyond conspiracy power control it's like I'm gonna get this kid this week on familial conspiracies popsy popsy the popsy episode popsy uncovered popsy puts a bag of money in his pants sure how that's helpful no um so so so that once I read all that I started thinking about it and one thing and and I think something you said early on because it got me I perked my ears perked up Popsy perked um because uh whenever I read these kinds of letters I'm always a little suspicious of the motive for writing in in the first place.
SPEAKER_00Because your goal is to be validated right so you're gonna frame it in the way that's most likely to get you validated.
SPEAKER_03Right. So you're gonna leave out so it's like having a one-sided trial.
SPEAKER_00Right. I'm gonna conveniently leave out the time that three years ago we took a family trip to Hawaii and my other grandchild Heather couldn't make it and unprompted I gave her a a bundle of cash equivalent to the Hawaii trip because I like Heather better. I'm gonna leave that story out.
SPEAKER_03I'm gonna leave out the part where I made all of my money on blood diamonds and you know Yeah blood diamonds exactly I wondered about this cat and I looked at his letter and I started thinking oh he this looks like he is calling out for the obvious you know response which is hey this kid's being greedy but it's also all about hey look how great I am as a grand I'm paying for this trip. I'm paying for everybody I am stunned I was happy to help them with wedding expenses and part of the down payment on the first home look at all the cool so much for them already and look at the ingr the sheer ingratitude. Yeah so then you start wondering well what is the content what is the right what else don't we know? Yeah what happens between these people normally and why is he scheduling a trip?
SPEAKER_00Right.
SPEAKER_03Is it just yeah when he knows they're expecting a baby he knows they can't know they're expecting a baby he knows about the baby they knows about the baby knows about the baby popsy knows about the baby popsy knows scram hide in the closet hide the baby in the closet so I started being very suspicious of Popsy and what he was all about. Also if I was in this situation on either end I wouldn't write into a public forum to say what do you think guys? Right because it just feels a little needy.
SPEAKER_00It does it's the I want the attention I want the I'm wondering if Popsy's the one that's a little entitled I wonder yeah it's making all of this conversation is swaying me because like I said on the surface the idea of telling somebody that they owe me money because I can't make a trip they invited me on makes me want to die.
SPEAKER_03But this background stuff I don't know I don't know and if you're and if this guy has done all these other things like giving them money for a wedding giving them money for a house they've obviously have this relationship where he's giving them cash for all kinds of things.
SPEAKER_04Right.
SPEAKER_03So you could almost imagine a regular person who's totally well intentioned who knows they have this relationship already where Popsy has been very generous where he says hey we can't come we'd like to come hey how about this?
SPEAKER_00Right. Yeah and it's in the ask right it's in how they asked it right was it was it well why don't you do this for us instead or was it would you consider potentially da da da da da da yeah would you consider changing your name from Popsy to something else can the baby call you anything can he call you cramp Dave can the baby just call you Dave playing egg yeah was that ever a real name I don't know eggbert yeah it's I was reading something recently about how names like Kermit and Grover used to be just very you know common run of the mill names when they were given to Muppets and then once they were given to Muppets now they sound so caricature that the idea of naming a child Kermit or Grover these days seems wild.
SPEAKER_03Yeah yeah maybe eggbert's the same way Grover I uh had some friends yeah uh I don't well at one time at one time obviously I don't have friends now because I spend my time doing a podcast right but when I did have friends I knew these people and they had a fresh baby fresh and this was in modern times this wasn't back in the way back times okay so there was a modern modern people having a modern baby and a fresh baby of Bel Air a fresh baby and they named it Grady Grady and I'm thinking what do you think of when you hear the name Grady I think of someone who at age 17 is a stoned surfer and by age 47 is on the Supreme Court. Wow you went such a different way but not in a good way okay like there's an it's like that but negative not in a good way in a good way stone surfer to supreme court but not in a very like in a very like my fraternity got me here kind of way see when I heard Grady I thought of uh middle school janitor oh okay okay or caretaker I can hear I can oh yeah like a like a cryptkeeper uh no not cryptkeeper so much but kind of just kind of like you know with a lot of keys and stuff lots of yeah big ring of keys maybe kind of slight build sort of older a lot of gray mustache stringy just kind of well I got a key to that someplace in there let me just try this one well that isn't gonna work that I know this might take me a while you might want to take a load off sit down over there on that on that tree something you sound like the vulture from Robinhood. I just don't know what's happening. The vulture from Robinhood from Robin Hood ladies and gentlemen we do have special guests so um so as I thought about it I realized just what you were saying you know it all depends on how you ask and what the connection is and I realized there's nothing wrong with this kid making a cash grab and there's nothing wrong with Popsy saying hit the road junior yeah like I'm not gonna do that like either they're both okay here nobody's bad and I resent Popsy a little bit for writing in about it and for airing the family business. Because this is gonna get back to junior.
SPEAKER_00Yeah this is our dirty laundry. This this might get back to baby when the baby comes out and the baby gets old enough to read this and the baby you took some heart shaped boxers heart print boxers with a skin mark on them and you put them on a flagpoil and you hoisted it up there for every that's the family's dirty laundry. I heard flagpoil I I did say flagpoil because hoisted was was next in my brain. Hoisted it on the poil hoisted it on the poil.
SPEAKER_03Yeah so uh what was that though you're hoisting the skin marks on a yeah oh dirty laundry the airing of the dirty laundry yeah wow I I when you said loundry when I heard poil mine mine went blank everything else went out the window I was panicking actually hide the poil the Pepsi is here hide the baby hide the poil um so so yeah I think it's okay and then you know I realized that this is actually like not only do I think it's okay for Junior to ask for some dough yeah then I realized you know I started thinking about situations where I have talked to people at various times in their lives when they feel like they are owed a raise like they've earned a raise at work and they're so afraid to ask.
SPEAKER_00Yeah that's scary stuff.
SPEAKER_03And I know and I want to talk about that because my advice has always been is and this is the advice I gave myself wrong or right I don't know but whenever I was in that position I always felt completely entitled to ask because we're talking about my money. So the advice I always give is wait a minute so you are talking about your money that you're making by showing up for work. You can talk about it anytime you want yeah you can ask for anything they may say no right they may say you you you stink we don't even like you then it's you it's on you to decide how you want to react to that right if that's okay I can deal with that or if it's I need to go somewhere else then. But it's your money right right there should be absolutely nothing because the thing is well I I don't want people I was just having a conversation the other day with one of my friends who's in this very situation is well I don't want them to think that I'm being greedy and it's like you're working right you're doing labor for them. Yeah there's no greed no you think you're worth more ask for it exactly and come up you have to come up with a reason. You can't just say well I always show up for work on time. Yeah that's like right that's why we pay you at all it's not that you should be afraid that they think you're greedy you should be afraid that they think that you suck at your job. That should be the fear the fear should be no you're not worth it and maybe that is the fear.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_03One thing that gets played I think on workers is the budget. We don't have the budget it's just not in our budget.
SPEAKER_00It's not in the budget um you know well you know uh a lot of they like to say well we have these set ranges and that is the case at my work and there is there is something to be said for us negotiating as a as a as employees to have made those ranges fair to begin with right theoretically and right yeah so so and so there's a little bit of this this power play and uh sometimes
SPEAKER_03That's legitimate. Like they really, that's it. This is what we can pay you for this job, Wander. But I never like it when it sounds threatening.
SPEAKER_00No. And I mean, that was the time that I went in, my manager was very understanding about it, and you know, we'll pass this up the chain and we'll see what we can do. And even when the answer was no, it was a very kind no.
SPEAKER_03But that's the way it should be. Exactly. It shouldn't be because management shouldn't be threatened by an employee asking for more. There's no threat.
SPEAKER_01No.
SPEAKER_03And the and the employee shouldn't feel threatened by management for asking. Right. They've that should be subtracted out of the equation.
SPEAKER_00Exactly. It should just be out of the equation.
SPEAKER_03No one is being greedy. No. One person thinks they should make more.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_03And then the other person can decide whether that's valid or not and whether it can be afforded, because that's you know why people sometimes leave places and go to new places. Because the place they're at, they can't they can't pay them out enough. Right.
SPEAKER_00Right. And so then right, the answer was no. And I got to decide, okay, is what I'm making enough of a living wage for me. Am I happy with this job and where I am? Or do I need to move on if the answer is no? And the answer was, okay, this is fine. I can stay. And over time I'll I'll get I I get an increase in wage the longer I stay, too. So I'm like, all right, over time I'll get there. It's fine.
SPEAKER_03Right. So I I just I want to encourage people not to be embarrassed to ask for money if you think you deserve it. It's your money. You're working for it. You get to have a conversation about it.
SPEAKER_00We all need money to stay alive in the late-stage capitalist hellscape that we have found ourselves in.
SPEAKER_03Drop the mic.
SPEAKER_00How dare we have basic human needs that require funds.
SPEAKER_03Drop the pitchfork.
SPEAKER_00Drop the pitchfork. Drop the pitchfork, hide the baby, ask for your money.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00There's been a lot of commentary recently about, especially in a post-COVID world, about businesses saying, like, well, we can only afford to pay you this much because of how things are performing. And you know, if we if we can't do X, Y, and Z, we can't stay open. It's like, okay, yeah, if you can't pay your employees a living wage, you're already a failed business. I don't know what to tell you.
SPEAKER_03Well, and a lot of times they don't, you don't have all the information you need to evaluate the credibility of the statements they're making. You don't have access to the financial.
SPEAKER_00There's no transparency.
SPEAKER_03You don't have any access to the meetings where decisions are being made for how to spend the money and how well who's taking what.
SPEAKER_00Right. It's you know, we can't pay you these bonuses because then CEO Steve would have to give up one of his 17 private jets, and we cannot ask CEO Steve to do that.
SPEAKER_03How about CEO Grady?
SPEAKER_00CEO Grady would have to give up one of his incredibly dope keys.
SPEAKER_03He's got keys on there that don't even go to anything.
SPEAKER_00They don't go to anything. But he's a $17,000 key and it does not go to any.
SPEAKER_03Grady is thinking like someday I might find the lock with this key. I don't know where this key's from, but someday it's from God. A key from God to open the gates of Versailles and let Madeline in with her pitchfork.
SPEAKER_00Let me in.
SPEAKER_03She can poke a king. What? Okay. So now that we uh well let me just wow. So we know that with every new generation there's a concern, a wringing of the hands, if you will. That the newest generation is too entitled.
SPEAKER_00Too entitled.
SPEAKER_03They're just too entitled as compared to some other generation.
SPEAKER_00Back in my day. So I, if I may, I read this great little anecdote. I cannot remember the name of this ancient figure that it was about, but it was someone in ancient Rome or Greece. It was an account that had been found of this person basically saying, these kids in their newfangled sundials, back in my day, we just had to know what time it was by where the sun was in the sky. I don't know what makes them so special that they have these sundials. It's been happening forever.
SPEAKER_03Was it Pliny the Elder?
SPEAKER_00I mean, he was Winy the Elder, basically, right? So maybe.
unknownOh wow.
SPEAKER_00I don't know.
SPEAKER_03Do you know Pliny died trying to do a rescue operation when uh Vesuvius blew up and Pompeii was pretty cool.
SPEAKER_00He had a lot of weird, bad medical advice, but he was sure trying his best.
SPEAKER_03Are you thinking of Pliny the Younger? Because there was Pliny the Younger and Pliny the Elder.
SPEAKER_00Oh, maybe I don't know. Maybe I don't know.
SPEAKER_03Pliny the Elder died in a failed rescue. I don't know. I don't know if we can go that far.
SPEAKER_00Okay, never mind.
SPEAKER_03I don't like that. No. So my question for you So So this whole thing about entitlement. Are people so question number one. Yeah. Are people more entitled today?
SPEAKER_00Then when?
SPEAKER_03Compared to any other time.
SPEAKER_00No, I think people are people.
SPEAKER_03People are people.
SPEAKER_00Well, okay, okay. I think that the 1% are sure pretty entitled, but I think it's pretty comparable to something like uh, you know, the aristocracy during the French Revolution. So like there's been plenty of entitlement throughout history.
SPEAKER_03Off with our heads.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Uh like a lot of these revolutions, though, especially that one, it gets out of hand, doesn't it?
SPEAKER_00It does. There is that about it.
SPEAKER_03Once you start chopping off heads with a guillotine, is a guillotine? Guillotine.
SPEAKER_00It's guillotine if you're going off the French pronunciation. But yeah, once you start that, it gets too fun.
SPEAKER_03And then everybody wants a turn.
SPEAKER_00Right, right. I mean, I can think of of several gazillionaires who I would personally love to see guillotined, but uh but then where does the buck stop?
SPEAKER_03Where does the buck stop?
SPEAKER_00Right.
SPEAKER_03So uh people are people, you say. Yes. There's a maybe a greedy group at the top. My feeling is that A, every everyone's feels entitled. Yeah. Everyone, every single person. Yeah. Uh in a lot of the world, anyway, the standard of living has steadily improved over the generations. It's still got a long way to go, and there's a lot of people suffering, but in general, on average, it's been improving. And anytime, I don't care who you are and what your situation is, when it gets a little better, whatever that means, then you want a little more. When it gets a little better, then you're like, well, why can't it be just a little better? I have seen I don't know if that's really bad.
SPEAKER_00No, I don't think so. But I have also, I think the way that that reflects outward from us is I have seen it said that when you have gone through something hard, you have two main possible reactions to other people not having to go through that, right? One of them is I had to suffer and I grew characters, so why doesn't this person have to suffer as well? This is how the world works, it should just work this way. And the other reaction is I had to suffer and I don't want anyone else to have to suffer, right?
SPEAKER_03Right. And that's typically the the orientation of many parents is I want it to be better for my kids.
SPEAKER_00Don't we want a better world for our kids? Yeah.
SPEAKER_03And if you do, then you shouldn't be surprised if they feel a little more entitled to something better.
SPEAKER_00Because I mean You're the one telling them that they should have something better.
SPEAKER_03And if from the moment you open your eyes and somebody's putting a boob in your mouth, I mean you're kind of like on this planet. What else am I gonna get?
SPEAKER_00Someone puts a boob in your mouth.
SPEAKER_03I think Popsy might be kind of a goon here.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I think I wouldn't be surprised.
SPEAKER_03I think the guy needs I don't know.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I think Popsy needs a privilege chick.
SPEAKER_03The blanket treatment where you'd wrap the guy in a blanket.
SPEAKER_00Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Swatt like a swaddle. Uh not really like how you put how you put thunder blankets on dogs. Yeah, not really.
SPEAKER_03It wasn't exactly that. Oh, never mind. You wrap a guy in a blanket and you stick him in a station wagon and you give him a you give him uh you give him the treatment.
SPEAKER_00This sounds horrible, boss.
SPEAKER_03I had this is awful. Speaking of the good old days, so anyway, so anyway, so but you know, younger generations have all, as you pointed out, they've always been scorned. Yeah, they've always been thought frivolous and somehow less than acceptable with their behavior and their values. And, you know, again, we give kids everything, we make the light, we do all these things to make the world better. Right. And a kid comes along into that world, and why wouldn't they expect that anymore? Why would first of all, you would you get a boob in your mouth from the jump, and then everything else is given to you, and you're like, well, okay, that's great. What else? Right. There's nothing we all do it. Yeah we just do it in our own context. Now, the third part of my response to this entitlement question is when it comes to older people, everybody hates them. Now, why? Why do we hate them? I've said this before. I know why. It's because they're the har is it harbinger or harbinger?
SPEAKER_01Harbinger.
SPEAKER_03They're the harbinger of the death and decay. Actually, it's the other way around. The decay and death that we all face. They're walking, they're walking examples of what's in front of us.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, what's to come.
SPEAKER_03So, first of all, we don't want to see that.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I don't want to look at that shit.
SPEAKER_03Get that sack of wrinkles and take it down the road, Popsy. Yep. So um also uh older people, besides uh sitting on their money if they have any, yeah, are cranky because many times they've been marginalized because nobody likes them. So they don't get treated great.
SPEAKER_00Which is bad.
SPEAKER_03They've got body stuff, like their bodies falling apart.
SPEAKER_00Everything just kind of hurts.
SPEAKER_03They everything hurts. They wake up, their arm is in a sink, and they don't know why.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, what's that doing there?
SPEAKER_03Why? I don't remember my arm.
SPEAKER_00I don't remember putting that back.
SPEAKER_03My arm was on my body last night when I went to bed. Now it's in the I've got toes in the toilet.
SPEAKER_00What the heck? And hairs in places you've never heard of.
SPEAKER_03God, my hair's got hair. They've got mental stuff going on sometimes. They got money stuff. Speaking of money stuff, they're sometimes they don't got any.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_03A lot of older people in this country do not have the adequate money. So they're not hoarding the money like Popsy.
SPEAKER_00Right.
SPEAKER_03They're not using the money control.
SPEAKER_00That categorically older folks are hoarding the money, right? It's that the 1% is hoarding the money.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, and uh, so a lot of old people are cranky for a reason. They're not on their best behavior, plus they got other stuff going on. And so, um, you know, they're not the most pleasant people to be around all the time.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Would you would you say that it's possible that, you know, person to person, we all have our pluses and our minuses and our struggles. And maybe, maybe these generalizations don't always serve us.
SPEAKER_03You have just read my uh Tinder bio.
SPEAKER_00Oh my gosh.
SPEAKER_03No, it's something about I've got what is it now? You say I have got pluses and minuses.
SPEAKER_00Yes. Oh, I see. Yeah, I've got pluses and minuses.
SPEAKER_03Everyone has weaknesses.
SPEAKER_00I've got my own struggles.
SPEAKER_03I've got my own struggles. I have a lot of weaknesses, and I'm just laying it out here for you. If you're looking for someone with a lot of weaknesses, yeah. Uh so um, yes, I would agree with that. I would agree that all of us want something a little better than what we have. It's normal. It doesn't make you a bad person. Um, doesn't make you entitled. And it's easy to look at other people and say, oh, well, they're entitled because they have this expectation or this desire to want something.
SPEAKER_00I think it'll just get handed to them.
SPEAKER_03Um I th I think that we're all in the same boat, actually.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I feel like we're all in the same boat here.
SPEAKER_00There's a difference between thinking that you want something or even that you deserve something, and thinking that the world owes you something.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. I just think you can even be that way. You can even think the world owes you.
SPEAKER_00The world does owe me some shit. Well, why not? Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Why, why I don't even think that's bad. I just think you have to be prepared for the world to say, no, we don't.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think part of where I'm coming from is perspective as a queer woman. Um, and I'm thinking about I didn't have a particularly tough time. I also didn't realize I was queer until I was somewhat in my early 20s. But I wasn't, you know, I didn't go through a particularly tough time for that or a particularly tough time once I came out. Um and still the early 2000s were when I was when I was a, you know, a preteen and then a teenager were more homophobic than we remember in a lot of ways, I think. And I hope that a kid in in middle school or high school now experiences less casual homophobia in their day-to-day than I did, and therefore maybe has an easier time figuring out and coming to terms with the fact that they're queer, right? So situationally like that, I want that kid to have experienced less of that particular hardship than I did, right? Agreed.
SPEAKER_03Agreed.
SPEAKER_00There are hardships that they need to experience to figure out how to be a person in the world and to to learn the skills to cope when something bad does happen. But I don't think it needs to be bullied for being queer. I don't think it needs, right? Like there's right.
SPEAKER_03I think ultimately, you know, we need to give each other uh a lot more grace when it comes to this whole issue of entitlement, whether you're younger or in the middle or older. Um it's the context that matters. It's the situation which we started saying um early on with the popsy letter where we started wondering, like, what's really like what's actually the but what's the full picture here? And that's the question you ask when you think someone's being entitled. That's the next question. Should be well, well, maybe what I need to look into what the full picture is. Also, you need to know we're at Portland Underground Studio recording today. And we're happy to be here. If you need to record something, you're in it, you're in the uh Portland area. Come on by. Call Derek, he's great. Call Derek 1-800 Derek, he'll pick up the phone. That's the number. He'll pick up the phone. Uh, and he will gladly set up your page.
SPEAKER_00Any street corner in Portland, you can just yell Derek, and if you spin around three times, he will appear.
SPEAKER_03He does lurk.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_03He's a lurker. Well, thanks, Madeline, for talking to me about entitlement. You've opened my eyes.
SPEAKER_00Oh, thank you, Ross. Right back at you.
SPEAKER_03You've opened my eyes as wide as they can go.
SPEAKER_00Uh huh.
SPEAKER_03And I'm seeing the poil.
SPEAKER_00I'm seeing the poil through the gates of Versailles.
SPEAKER_03Thank you, everyone, for joining us for this episode. If you like what we do, uh, as I say, we need your help. You can follow us on Instagram and you can reach out to us that way, and we will respond. And if you can share the show any way you can with anyone you can, that really helps us grow. We are also on Patreon. We're completely independent. You may have noticed there's no ads. We need you to make this work.
SPEAKER_00Feel entitled.
SPEAKER_03I know that I do. And we hope you will tune in to another episode because whether you are rolling your popsy for spare change or just someone poking a king with a pitchfork, it's important to remember that we all smell like humans. Goodbye, everybody. Goodbye.